im a BIT of a history nerd *puts a hand on my hip, puts on my glasses, cracks open an encyclopedia* did you know obama is the president
It’s practically 2014 and you guys still don’t know how to google if an article is real or not before giving it 100,000 notes
*swipes debit card*
*purchase goes through*
me: God is good all the time
Cashier: all the time God is good
sorry guys can’t hang out right now I’m working on my aesthetic
In high school I would regularly be late to class for no real reason and if the teacher was upset I would quietly inform the teacher I had just had a bowel movement. I would be careful to always use the phrase “bowel movement”. For teachers this worked on, I would do it so often they just came to believe I had some sort of physical problem that they were accommodating for. Not once was I ever questioned about it. Why would I make that up? Just found out this is called the criterion of embarrassment, and it’s sometimes used to prove the existence of Jesus Christ.